Sunday, February 27, 2005
( 11:24 PM ) The Rat
"Are you happy?" I asked her anxiously. There was a long pause during which I picked up the vase and pushed it to the side, next to the wall.
"I don't know," she said. "No one ever taught me how to be happy."
—Reading Lolita in Tehran
# Posted by The Rat @ 11:24 PM
Saturday, February 26, 2005
( 9:40 PM ) The Rat
RETRO SPOOFS POSTERS.
# Posted by The Rat @ 9:40 PM
( 8:06 PM ) The Rat
HIV INFECTION RATE AMONG BLACKS DOUBLES.
# Posted by The Rat @ 8:06 PM
Wednesday, February 23, 2005
( 11:46 AM ) The Rat
POLICE PAIR NABS ROBBERS ON WAY TO NUPTIALS. How cool is this. Via IKM.
Inspector Gustav Myburgh and Constable Barbara Beogner were being driven to their wedding near Johannesburg Saturday when they spotted a crime in progress, police spokesman Eugene Opperman said.
"He was in uniform, she was in her bridal gear, when they saw a hijacking taking place," Opperman said.
The wedding party gave chase and eventually forced the assailants off the road, arresting three men and confiscating an illegal firearm. They then continued on to the wedding...
# Posted by The Rat @ 11:46 AM
( 11:41 AM ) The Rat
SOME PRETTY GOOD horoscopes this week.
# Posted by The Rat @ 11:41 AM
( 11:29 AM ) The Rat
TSUNAMI UNCOVERS ANCIENT CITY IN INDIA.
# Posted by The Rat @ 11:29 AM
( 11:26 AM ) The Rat
Purpose is but the slave to memory,
Of violent birth, but poor validity;
Which now, like fruit unripe, sticks on the tree,
But fill unshaken when they mellow be.
Most necessary 'tis that we forget
To pay ourselves what to ourselves is debt.
What to ourselves in passion we propose,
The passion ending, doth the purpose lose.
The violence of either grief or joy
Their own enactures with themselves destroy.
Where joy most revels, grief doth most lament;
Grief joys, joy grieves, on slender accident.
This world is not for aye, nor 'tis not strange
That even our loves should with our fortunes change;
For 'tis a question left us yet to prove,
Whether love lead fortune, or else fortune love.
# Posted by The Rat @ 11:26 AM
Tuesday, February 22, 2005
( 12:54 AM ) The Rat
And I have still other smothered memories, now unfolding themselves into limbless monsters of pain. Once, in a sunset-ending street of Beardsley, she turned to little Eva Rosen (I was taking both nymphets to a concert and walking behind them so close as almost to touch them with my person), she turned to Eva, and so very serenely and seriously, in answer to something the other had said about its being better to die than hear Milton Pinski, some local schoolboy she knew, talk about music, my Lolita remarked: 'You know, what's so dreadful about dying is that you are completely on your own'; and it struck me, as my automaton knees went up and down, that I simply did not know a thing about my darling's mind and that quite possibly, behind the awful juvenile clichés, there was in her a garden and a twilight, and a palace gate—dim and adorable regions which happened to be lucidly and absolutely forbidden to me, in my polluted rags and miserable convulsions; for I often noticed that living as we did, she and I, in a world of total evil, we would become strangely embarrassed whenever I tried to discuss something she and an older friend, she and a parent, she and a real healthy sweetheart, I and Annabel, Lolita and a sublime, purified, analyzed, deified Harold Haze, might have discussed—an abstract idea, a painting, stippled Hopkins or shorn Baudelaire, God or Shakespeare, anything of a genuine kind...
# Posted by The Rat @ 12:54 AM
Thursday, February 17, 2005
( 11:11 PM ) The Rat
PUPPIES BEHIND BARS.
# Posted by The Rat @ 11:11 PM
( 11:09 PM ) The Rat
# Posted by The Rat @ 11:09 PM
( 10:59 PM ) The Rat
LOBSTERS UNLIKELY TO FEEL PAIN.
# Posted by The Rat @ 10:59 PM
( 10:58 PM ) The Rat
GENTLEMEN'S CLUB CHALLENGES NUDE ORDINANCE.
A city ordinance bans complete nudity at all gentleman's clubs, but one has challenged that ordinance by distributing pencils and sketch pads to patrons during "art night."
The ordinance does give nudity exclusions for artistic displays which include dance, ballet and dramatic performances, so every Monday and Tuesday, the club encourages customers to sketch the models as they perform nude routines...
# Posted by The Rat @ 10:58 PM
( 10:57 PM ) The Rat
WOMAN RUNS DURING WEDDING PROPOSAL AT MAGIC GAME. Ouch.
The unidentified man asked his girlfriend to marry him in front of thousands of fans at the Magic's 97-94 victory over the New Orleans Hornets at the TD Waterhouse Centre.
The man, who was standing on the court, dropped to a knee and asked the woman to marry him.
Instead of answering, the woman turned and ran off the court with her face in her hands...
# Posted by The Rat @ 10:57 PM
( 10:56 PM ) The Rat
Most porn hacks cherish the hope of becoming real writers someday, so there comes a point when you start to fight back in obscure little ways. Since plot, characterization, imagery, allusion, tragedy, and comedy were all taboo, I took refuge in maniacally elegant grammar. It made me think I was writing well to have my pimps and sluts and degenerates say things like:
'On whom did you go down?'
'His cock is not so large as Bob's.'
'I have fewer rubbers than I thought.'
'If this be the clap, I'll kill you.'
—When Sisterhood Was in Flower
# Posted by The Rat @ 10:56 PM
Wednesday, February 16, 2005
( 2:58 AM ) The Rat
'I know what you want,' said the sea witch; 'it is very stupid of you, but you shall have your way, and it will bring you to sorrow, my pretty princess. You want to get rid of your fish's tail, and to have two supports instead of it, like human beings on earth, so that the young prince may fall in love with you, and that you may have an immortal soul.' And then the witch laughed so loud and disgustingly, that the toad and the snakes fell to the ground, and lay there wriggling about. 'You are but just in time,' said the witch; 'for after sunrise to-morrow I should not be able to help you till the end of another year. I will prepare a draught for you, with which you must swim to land tomorrow before sunrise, and sit down on the shore and drink it. Your tail will then disappear, and shrink up into what mankind calls legs, and you will feel great pain, as if a sword were passing through you. But all who see you will say that you are the prettiest little human being they ever saw. You will still have the same floating gracefulness of movement, and no dancer will ever tread so lightly; but at every step you take it will feel as if you were treading upon sharp knives, and that the blood must flow. If you will bear all this, I will help you.'
'Yes, I will,' said the little princess in a trembling voice, as she thought of the prince and the immortal soul...
—"The Little Mermaid"
# Posted by The Rat @ 2:58 AM
Tuesday, February 08, 2005
( 1:54 PM ) The Rat
TWINS BORN TWO MONTHS APART. I hope the older one completely lords it over the younger in a few years.
# Posted by The Rat @ 1:54 PM
( 1:50 PM ) The Rat
WELCOME TO THE NEW SOUTH. The Rat, who is about to head down to Atlanta for a week, was just addressed over e-mail by one of her hosts as "y'all."
# Posted by The Rat @ 1:50 PM
Friday, February 04, 2005
( 4:01 PM ) The Rat
HAVING SEEN THIS at a Barnes & Noble yesterday, the Rat is trembling for her country.
# Posted by The Rat @ 4:01 PM
Wednesday, February 02, 2005
( 2:25 PM ) The Rat
Words, words, words.
# Posted by The Rat @ 2:25 PM